revolusi nama aku

Xder bnde sbnanye nak tulis, so ari ni aku crite skit pasal name aku. Nama penuh aku Normadia binti Mohd Khalid. Tp dr kecik lagi dah ader percanggahan pendapat antara mak n abah aku. Mak nak letak nama NorNadia tp abah g daftarkan Normadia. So disbabkan mak nak jugak name tu, die pun pgl la aku dr kecik Nadia. N family yg rapat sume kenal aku sbagai Nadia. Xpenah terkelua nama madia tu.. smpai la aku skola rendah.. baru la ader org strt pgl aku madia. Smpai darjah 6 aku pegang nama tuh..

Bila pindah skola menengah, aku pindah umah..dah xduduk Sg buloh lagi..pindah blik Kg Pandan sbb dlu mase aku kecik2 mmg dok Kg Pandan. Start skola mngah, cm biase la aku kenalkan name aku kat dorg madia. Tp disebabkan dorg ni malas nk pgl pnjg2, so dorg pendekkan name aku jadi Mad. Sbb skola pompuan so xde maslh la nk gune nme cam lelaki skit..mmg mber yg len pun pgllan dorg akan ade 3huruf jer.. ringkas dan padat. Aku dipanggil la dgn nme tu shingga tamat Form 6.

Memasuki dunia universiti, sperti biase aku akan memperkenalkan name aku sbg madia..
Pastu dpt geng yg mmg ngam satu kepala nye, dgn sesedap rase tnpa meminta pendapat sesiape, name aku ditukarkan kepada Madie. So since first year lagi, sume org yg knl aku pagl nme tuh. Dari course mate,rumate,pensyarah, senior, junior..sape2 lah..aku knlkan nme aku sbgai Madie..and kekallah pglan tu smpai skrg..kat tmpt keje pun aku kenalkan name aku Madie..

Kat umah lak len crite, lau kat umah nenek aku mmg pgl Angah.. same goes tu my dad’s family, tp blik jer umah mak, trus tukar pgl adik. Sbb mak kte aku anak last die. Mmg la belah mak aku xder adik lagi,tp belah abah ader..lepas abah cerai ngn mak n kawen len, abah dpt anak 2 org(adik aku la tuh). So aku mmg kne tukar2 pglan ikut suasana and persekitaran. Yg penting skrg ni anak buah aku pun aku suruh pgl angah jugak, jgn pndai2 tmbh mak ngah..hahahhaha..


Kesimpulannye, lau aku nak ingt mber tu aku knl kat mane, aku akan dgr nme panggilan die kat aku.. then aku tau la aku knl dorg tuh dr zmn mane..lau aku kua gn mber form 6 n mber U serentak lagi best, pgl nme aku len2..

rasa macam baru semalam[ni masuk mode kenangan+teringt]

Rasa macam baru smalam jer

Saya masuk kelas first year utk introduce KP
Berkenalan ngn awak and the others
Kuar ngn awak g round Penang dgn van yg xder road tax, minyak abis tgh jalan but we still enjoy our day.
Lepak kat tgh padang smbil sume org share their problems
Kite busy ngn Gegar U smpai xtido mlm, g PISA n all the stuff,g CONVEX on d last day to enjoy ourselves.
Kite msg without anyone know
Kite kua berdua for the first time for tea
Kita declare couple on 23 September 2007,5.25am.
Kite spend time for birthdays celebration, sahur everynite
Kite spend time on weekends utk mghabiskan ari cuti( gado+baik)
Awak dtg umah mase sem break n I cook for u n ur brother, bwk jln2 area KL.
Awak ckp I’m ur last one
Awak kucup dahi saya mase saya nk blik cuti sem smbil saya nangis sbb awak lmbt smpai.
Awak naik cuti bwk moto, n ever since, awak brubah.ignoring me,xnk kua ngn sy, xreply msg sy,xcol sy lagi, ajak dinner pun xnk.
Ader org nasihat to leave u before I get hurt and for the sake of my pride n heart.
Tapi awak tau x, saya xnak sbb per, sbb saya sayang awak. Sayang sgt.. and I don’t want to leave u. u are my everything.
And sebulan saya tahan sblm tarikh keramat tu. Jam 8.25 am 12 April 2008, awak msg ckp awak bnci sgt kat saya.
Time tu awak btol2 wat perkara yg saya takutkan n ape yg org tue ckp akhirnya jadi kenyataan. Org tu ckp die dah tau lame. Awak tau, hancur btol hati saya. Im not being myself that time. Crying like crazy. And the worst part is, saya ngh exam.
Saya tanggung beban tu smpai Tuhan utuskan seseorg utk ringankan bebankan saya dan bawak saya kuar dari alam khayalan saya tu. And he remind me not worth it to sakit sbb awak. U don’t deserve me.
Saya masuk sem dgn nafas n smgt baru. And ur look worst. xterurus lngsung. Pity u ha?
Saya try utk utk hidup tnpa awak n it took me a year. Finally I can let u go. Totally.
I told myself, d moment I saw u with another girl, then u are out of my mind. 12 April 2009. I saw u with another girl, n ur gone from my life.

And now
Saya rasa dah leh terima everything
Saya terima penjelasan awak
Saya terima awak kate segan nak berhubung lagi ngn saya sbb saya baik sgt kat awak n awak malu wat saya mcm tu
Saya ade hidup baru yg lagi bermakna without u
Saya ada kwn2 yg sayang saya n never hurt me like u did
Saya ada sahabat yg always there for me come high and low water.
Even sumtimes sy teringt kat awak and our memories, its juz kngn yg datang n pergi.
Saya maafkan sume per awak wat kat saya and saya mintak maaf jugak utk sume salah saya kat awak.

Kenapa aku tulis bnde ni even bnde ni dah jadi sjarah, sbb tibe2 rase nak luahkan sumthing yg lame terbuku. Even dah lame sgt bnde ni tersimpan, now bru rase nk share ngn org len.
Maybe nothing to u but sumthing to me.

U maybe nothing to the world, but you might be everything to someone’s world.

lirik lagu yg memberi kesan kat aku smlm (12OCT2009)

Inikah berakhirnya
Hidupku yang ku rasa tidak secantik potret yang terlakar dikaca
Inikah makna cinta
Datangnya berbunga bunga belum dijamah pahitnya jelas terasa

Ku renung kisah kita
Perbalahan antara
Erti bersama
Airmata dan lelah buat kita berbalah
Dendam terujud segala yang indah
Hilang hilang

Dari satu hujung ke satu penghujung berlari
Tapi hanya makin ku jalani
Jalan jalan yang sempit sekali
Imbasan warna warni cerita cerita dalam hidup kita
Hingga paling kelam kan terpapar di slot akasia

Jauhku fikirkan tentang kita tanpa kita
Sedalam dalam kita mencari jawapan yang sama
Mungkin berbeza antara jalan yang ditentukan
Namun ku percaya jika mata ditutup disitu ada cinta

Berpasangan insan telah dijadikan
Dalam satu jiwa bakal mewujudkan
Bermusim kegelapan dapat dipinggirkan
Namun kita manusia senang dibutakan
Menyintai bukan untuk disakiti
Sejambak bicara harus ditepati
Carta belaian jiwa dilonjakkan tinggi
Tak menjunam jatuh menghempas ke bumi
Sejati itu yang kau ucapkan
Sebuah melodi dan hanyalah satu ungkapan
Kata kata lontaran sekadar ukiran hiasan
Takkan berbunyi bila bertepuk sebelah tangan
Setinggi mana tak guna nak dikecapi
Tiada dua satu jiwa tiada erti
Tiada lagi rekaan khayalan mimpi ngeri menyelubungi
Hanya meniti hari meneliti hati

stick with you -pussycat dolls

I don't want to go another day
So i'm telling you exactly what is on my mind
Seems like everybody is breaking up
Throwing their love away
I know i got a good thing right here
That's why i say (hey)

Nobody's going to love me better
I must stick with you
Forever
Nobody's going to take me higher
I must stick with you
You know how to appreciate me
I must stick with you
My baby
Nobody ever made me feel this way
I must stick with you

I don't want to go another day
So i'm telling you exactly what is on my mind
See the way we ride
In our privated lives
Ain't nobody getting in between
I want you to know that you're the only one for me
And i say

Nobody's going to love me better
I must stick with you
Forever
Nobody's going to take me higher
I must stick with you
You know how to appreciate me
I must stick with you
My baby
Nobody ever made me feel this way
I must stick with you

And now
Ain't nothing else i can need
And now
I'm singing 'cause you're so, so into me
I got you
We'll be making love endlessly
I'm with you
Baby, you're with me

So don't you worry about
People hanging around
They ain't bringing us down
I know you and you know me
And that's all that counts
So don't you worry about
People hanging around
They ain't bringing us down
I know you and you know me
And that's why i say

Nobody's going to love me better
I must stick with you
Forever
Nobody's going to take me higher
I must stick with you
You know how to appreciate me
I must stick with you
My baby
Nobody ever made me feel this way
I must stick with you

Nobody's going to love me better
I must stick with you
Forever
Nobody's going to take me higher
I must stick with you
You know how to appreciate me
I must stick with you
My baby
Nobody ever made me feel this way
I must stick with you

raya 2009

beraya di Tapah

first raya-Mama+along

tepi sungai ngh kutip durian blakg umah atok sdaraku

ngn bju kurung pun jadik jer

durian+telur burung unta???
this time raya, xbyk sgt amik gmbr coz my phone rosak..n i dont have camera.(pity me)..huhuh..nevertheless, still have few captures for this raya..first time raya withput gelaran STUDENT.. this year the family theme is green..yaa, we love d earth..*smile* for the first raya kat kg pandan(still kg lagi okey), the next raya g Tapah,Perak for suasana real kg..hahahah..tp bukan lebih pergi braya, juz g mandi sungai n cari durian..waaa, dengan bju kurung redah hutan..mmg out abis..3rd raya pulak kat umah mak di sg buloh..after a while kat sana, kne blik umah la sbb esok nye nak keje...sabtu lak g semenyih ziarah kubur arwah atuk n g umah makngah skali..from there trus g umah along kat putrajaya for "Mkn-mkn raya". thats what my cousin claimed..mkn nasi ayam yg sedap made by maklong..sekaligus mencilok few movies dri along transfered straight to my lappy..ade ke g raya umah org bwk lappy..hahahaa..
n ahad to pulak, my turn pulak wat mkn2 raya..n thankx to sme yg dtg..n of cz sory to bing n gf coz xdpt entertain time tu coz sgt buzy di dapur..(spe suh dtg awal)..best coz jumpe mber lame yg dh 5taun xjumpe..n d chef of d day is my acik..menu nye ialah spagetthi, meehun singapore n meehun malaysia..looks like everyone dah grow up..rase kejap sgt...bile bukak blik cite skola, xsdr mase dah brlalu..sume dtg ngn bf, jmput dtg majlis tunang n kwen..n ade sorg tu siap dtg bwk perut ag..6months pregnant..nsib baik la baby tu lom kuar,lau x xpasl jer kne kua duit raya..huhuhuhu..rase cm jap sgt mse brlalu..n aku?? bile lak nak kwen eh...

we are different.

A lot to say yet don’t know how to express. Sometimes words can hurt people more than a sword does. We can’t please everyone, that’s for sure. But how to please ourselves?? How to please myself?? A big question mark there.. Yes everyone has their feeling, their thought, their way of thinking, their personal opinions. Some might be the same, but some might not isn’t it? So what we should do is just accept the opinion without prejudice.
Why bother when someone have different opinion from you. You don’t even have the right to say it wrong. It’s their opinion. Respect as people respect your thought. Imagine if everyone thinking the same way, we could end up living in a monotonous world. What a life?? Does it matter to you if people like chocolate but your not. It’s because the different that makes us unique. And the uniqueness is beautiful.
Of course accepting one’s idea or thought is through thinking. Don’t simply blindly accept it. And when we accept it, think again, isn’t really suits you well? Are you capable of doing it or its just not you. Be yourself. That right. No one like you and that what makes you a YOU. Again, we can’t please everyone. So keep it simple and loves yourself. Let people condemn you, only you know what are the reason for all that happened. That’s good enough. Remember, The Al-Mighty knows better why He gives us the challenge to face. And He didn’t give what we can’t afford to take in.

Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri 2009

Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri diucapkan kepada mama, mak , abah n the rest of my family members. angah mintak maaf dari hujung rambut hingga hujung kaki. halalkan makan minum angah selama ni. maafkan angah lau ader terlepas ckp.

to my adik bradik..
maklong, along, angah, alang, acik,ateh and sue..anjang mintak maaf lau ader kata2 anjang yg mengguris perasaan, halalkan makan minum anjang slama kite kenal and anjang harap hubungan kita xkan terpisah walau jarak kita jauh.anjang sayang sgt kat korang sume.

to members and friends..
kepada semua yg mengenali madie samada baru kenal or dah lme..selamat hari raya to all of u and may this coming lebaran will bring u'll happiness. forgive all my wrong doings..

umumnye kepada semua umat Islam di dunia ini..

SELAMAT MENYAMBUT HARI RAYA AIDILFITRI 2009.
MAAF ZAHIR DAN BATIN


ikhlas daripada

MADIE@ANJANG

aku tak phm...

Aku tak paham nape org suke berjanji n tidak tunaikan. Selalu cakap tapi tak buat. And the best part nye, bile die salahkan org len sbb org tu ingtkan balik kat die pe yg die dah lupe. Aku yg xphm org ke org yg susah nk phm aku..aku rase aku dh ckup simple utk org dekat yet people still thought that I’m too hard too understand. Tak cye tnyelah kat lelaki yg penah rapat ngn aku..lau pompuan tu aku rase okey lagi la..
Aku ni senang jer sbnarnye..lau janji ngn aku, means kene tunaikan janji tu..lagi satu aku ni once dah syg kat org, mmg aku syg giler kat org tu..dlu aku ader la perjanjian with this guy that I knew since form six. Syg tu mmg tahap xingat la. Tp pas die masuk uni, die makin jauh ngn aku, n the answer very simple, “saya busy la”. “semua org berubah”, “saya dah xsame cam dlu”. “masing-masing ada tanggungjawab”.
Aku rase aku pun masuk u jugak, ader keje jugak. Tapi still ade mase utk cari die n everything. Ohh yea, maybe aku sangat senang n lapang time study dlu kot. Bile tnye the same answer keep repeating. And yes, I understand the statement and what do I do is move on with my life. But is it hard to juz send me one sms atleast to say how are u? rase cam per tau, aku rase cam dipinggirkan or dilupakan. Over? Sensitive? Or exaggerate? I don’t know. U tell me.
He’s right. I’m not a priority in his life. Actually I’m no one in his life. Well, he doesn’t need me. He has frens, he has girlfriend. Even though he told me that he never forget about me, but action speaks louder than words man. This crap that I wrote is juz to throw out my feelings that bother me lately. Why is it I’m the one who take the initiative to ask him out, to msg him. Am I that stupid to understand or I’m too blind to see. And of coz this guy is not my boyfren but he special to me.(I don’t about he felt about me?) does the word kakak means so much to him or its juz a word. “kak mad, saya tak penah lupe kat kak” rase cam nak pgg janji ni, tp makin hari makin pudar sbb dah rase jauh sgt. And I missed my “brother” so much.


*ignore the grammatical error*